Don't Let Sin In

 Hey folks.
        Here's my latest profound thought for y'all.... Don't let sin in. Where? Your life. ANY where. Wow. Awesome, huh? Too simple? I'm sure some of you are sayin' "Duh!" Well, until I finally "understood" this, it almost sent me flying off the sobriety wagon, just shortly after I got on it. There seem to be a million ideas in my head of things that I want to write for you, in hopes that some of you may find a similarity or three in your own walk down the road of Life, and thereby be forewarned, without experiencing the pain and trials I did. So, as I thought more about some of the experiences that I had along the way back to God, I recalled my first year of being sober, and some of the stupid things I did to try to prove to myself how strong I was with my sobriety. This story is where it all started, where I got that "AH HA!" moment. As you read on, I ask you to reflect on your own lives and of your struggles. Where are you taunting sin in your life? How is it getting in? Are you putting yourself into unnecessary situations in life that can get out of control and cause major problems and heartache? Thankfully, my sobriety was only challenged in the following story, but there's another lesson, or two, that I still had to learn before we get to the end of this post. Let's continue...

       First, let me throw out a bible verse to work from. As I've said in other posts, I've read the new Testament cover to cover a few times in the last 5 years, and some books from it dozens of times.(Yes, I also read the Old Testament, but not as much as I should. I'm workin' on that.) But, it seems like almost every time I read from the New Testament, I find a verse, or sometimes even whole paragraphs, that I didn't recall reading before. Here's one I just recently read: 1 Corinthians 10:21 "You cannot drink the cup of the Lord and the cup of demons, too; you cannot have a part in both the Lord's table and the table of demons." Wow. I sure wish I'd noticed this one a long time ago. Here's why...
           I'd been out of rehab for just shy of a year in the late Spring of '09. The local chapter of a motorcycle riding club that I had joined was hosting the annual state rally that year. I decided to go. I had made some good friends in this group over the last few months. They all knew I didn't drink anymore, and why, and some of them pledged their support in helping my sobriety, so that I could get rid of the "loner" lifestyle I had forced upon myself over the last few years. Well, it's a good thing I had these friends, because when darkness fell at the hotel, beer and liquor of all kinds appeared from everywhere. There were even keg "stations" in the courtyard around the pool! But, instead of losing control, I sat back and watched everyone get sloshed. And I took pictures. Lots of pictures. As I watched all of this unfold in front of my recently-sobered eyes, I began to finally see some of what my friends had seen during my drinking days. I laughed. It was still funny, at the time. I made it through that first night and rode back home, sober. I knew better than to stay at the hotel overnight. I was smart. Or so I thought. Then Day two came.
       
         When I got back to the hotel about 10:00 the next morning, the pool courtyard was a mess. A few bikers were still sittin' in the same chairs from when I left the night before. Others were staggering around extremely hung-over, and some were in hiding, embarrassed about their antics of the night before. And some were already drinking again.  Let me stop here and ask you,,, Does anybody see a problem with a raw-emotional, recovering alcoholic being here, yet?
         The bike games of the day were fun, and the basic rules of no riding and drinking were adhered to, except for a few parking lot rides. No one got hurt, thankfully. As night fell, the drinking began, in earnest, to catch up with some of the others who'd been trying to empty the kegs while everyone else rode. By the time we got to the awards presentations and auction, problems and attitudes began to rise. Then came the bright idea to go into the hotel bar for karaoke night. I had become close to a fellow club member throughout that weekend who was a fellow former Marine. So, he said he'd keep an eye on me in the club. Folks, I'm not sure I've ever seen this many stark raving wild drunks in a little 20x40' bar since my days overseas in the Corps. And, as usually happens, when you mix bikers, a bar, and alcohol, trouble ain't far behind. And so, an hour or so into the "festivities", another biker, not from our organization, decided to take a swing at our state 1st officer. Somebody later described it as a "sea of dew-rags and leather" headed towards the bar to help out our 1st officer.(A dew-rag is a bandanna style piece of cloth worn under the helmet to soak up sweat, or cause a bad hair day, dependin' on who u ask.) The next thing I knew, I was jumping over tables and crawling over people, trying to wade into the front of the excitement at the bar. Fortunately it was over quickly, and about a dozen of us "escorted" the hothead and his two friends out of the bar. There was more shouting and threats for a while, before I decided I'd had enough of this "fun" for the second night, so I got on my bike and headed home, instead of to a hospital or jail. I didn't stop and think until after I got home, how close either or both possibilities could have been....
  
        I am telling this, rather mild ending, of a story, to make a point. I didn't actually begin to learn this point until a week later, when I decided to look at all the pictures I took from the two nights of "biker revelry."  As I flipped from pic to pic, I began to see the other side of this "fun" they thought they were having. I saw husbands and wives mad at each other. I saw friends that were normally happy, relaxed people, had turned into howling wildmen, each with that distinctive hammered-drunk, crazed look in their eye. I saw people that were sick from drinking; some were even passed out on the lawn in the courtyard. For the first time, I saw what my friends had seen in me. It was then and there that I decided to learn how to give counsel to alcoholics and addicts. But, I learned something about myself too, that I'm trying to pass on to you. I began to understand that I couldn't continue to put myself in those situations. Now, I didn't catch this all at once.(I'm stubborn. Remember?) I tried to continue hanging out with a few old friends who still smoked weed, some drank, some friends who either didn't believe in God, or didn't believe that He could help them. I also rode with another large crew that had a few hard partying members. I even held a couple of mini-rallies at our home, where a few people drank quite a bit too much. Over the next year, I began to see the temptation creeping back into my life. And I hated it. I hated it because I didn't want to lose to this disease of addiction. I hated it because I didn't want to lose my friends. But, I knew that I had to make the gut-wrenching decision to walk away from many of them. At the time, I hated it most because of the temptation. I thought I could do this by myself, that I had enough control to have my old friends and just keep hanging out together. I knew that God wouldn't have wanted me just hanging around them, IF I'd have bothered to ask Him, but I was still trying to do things My way. On MY terms. I was still trying to get God onto MY road through Life. I still thought that I was supposed to lead. I was the pilot. God was my co-pilot. How'd that work for me??? Not too good....

     Here comes the tough part of  my lesson. As Christians, we can't half-do two things and expect to succeed. We can't drink from the cup of the Lord AND the cup of demons, too. Remember that I asked you to think about instances in your life that could be similar? Found anything yet? Now, I'm not calling my friends demons, and don't imply that yours are either. But, they have chosen a road that doesn't include them being led by the Word of God. I know someone's thinking right now,"But Jesus sat with drunks and prostitutes and tax collectors and all kinds of sinners." Yep. you're right. But, he wasn't just "hanging out." He was ministering the Word to them. HIS Word. I tried to do the same to My friends, too. Of course, I was nowhere near as successful as Jesus. But, a few of them have turned towards God. I have to admit though, that they didn't do it immediately after I spoke with any of them. What helped change them was, over time, to see how immensely God changed my life. And, do you know that not a one of them, following God or not, is mad at me for walking away? Think about this for a minute. I didn't go runnin' in and shame them. I didn't scream about them being thrown into lakes of fire. Some folks think I might should have. Nope. I showed them what Jesus's love had done to me and for me. But, once I had given them the opportunity to see and hear about my new life with Jesus, and I had witnessed to as many as possible, I knew that my "hanging out" days with them had come to a close. I had to take care of me. Any more time than I'd given, was just "tempting sin." I would have let sin back in.
    
        Some of this post may seem like I'm being judgmental of my old friends. I'd like to assure you, and any of them who may read this to recall, that I told them that they were always welcome to come by my house and talk. I've invited many of them to church. They all have my cell number and know that if they ever called me needing help, I would do my very best to help them in every way possible. I still love every single one of them. But, as Christians, in order to walk on God's road with Him leading, there are certain places that we cannot go, not going in His name. There are certain things we cannot do. And, there are certain parts of ourselves that we can't be again. That is the old person that we once were.  2 Corinthians 5:17 says" Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has gone. The new has come."  As I've said before, being a Christian isn't easy. We aren't always "high on God." But, as we learn His word and how to apply it, it prepares us for those tough valleys that every one of us walks through. There are days that I don't feel God around me. It is an awful, lonely feeling. That's where studying the Word comes in and strengthens us, and directs us, helping us to mature as Christians. By having a daily devotional with God, we begin to learn how to handle these situations. We learn when it's time to walk away, and we learn How to do it. The apostle Paul wrote about how come folks needed to be excommunicated from one of the churches he was trying to raise up. A little later, he also spoke about conditions to letting them back in. It's hard to know when to do things sometimes. So, besides you reading your bible, here's another reason to having fellowship with other Christians, for attending church regularly, and getting to know your preacher. Pastoral counseling can help you with these decisions, too. But, I always look to the written word of God for answers first. Once I've read it often enough, I know where to begin searching for answers to my problems in life. See?? It's simple, huh.... ;)

       Let's close with a prayer. " Heavenly Father, we thank you for making our spirits new through you. We thank you for your Holy Spirit that comforts us and guides us in our new life. We thank you for sending us your son, Jesus Christ, to cleanse us of sin and bring us salvation and the promise of eternal life  Lord, please teach us to see where we may still be letting sin into our lives. Then strengthen us, Lord, so that we may endure and defeat the pressure and temptations of this unholy world we live in.  Teach us, Lord, to live in your world, in your kingdom. Father, keep us from being judgmental. Help us to live with love in our heart. Help us to freely give to others, the love that you give to us. Give us the courage to walk boldly as Christians, leaving the arrogance and cynicism of our old selves dead, and just a memory of what we shouldn't be. Thank you, Lord, for the peace you bring to our hearts and souls. We give thanks and praise and all the glory to you, for making us into new creations. And we pray this prayer of love and gratitude in the name of our Lord, Jesus Christ. Amen.
 
    My prayers are with all of you who are struggling. Again, I appreciate all the kind emails and comments about this blog. Please pray for me, that I continue to hear and follow the direction that God is leading me. Please pray for this ministry, that we can spread God's word to all who have lost hope, to all who are suffering, and to all who have never heard His word.
Praise Jesus!
Peace to all of you,
                           Bro. Jay

2 Corinthians 5:11-21 New International Version (NIV)

                                                     The Ministry of Reconciliation

¹¹ Since, then, we know what it is to fear the Lord, we try to persuade others. What we are is plain to God, and I hope it is also plain to your conscience. ¹² We are not trying to commend ourselves to you again, but are giving you an opportunity to take pride in us, so that you can answer those who take pride in what is seen rather than in what is in the heart. ¹³ If we are “out of our mind,” as some say, it is for God; if we are in our right mind, it is for you. ¹⁴ For Christ’s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. ¹⁵ And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.

¹⁶ So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view. Though we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer. ¹⁷ Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come:^[a] The old has gone, the new is here! ¹⁸ All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: ¹⁹ that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. ²⁰ We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God. ²¹ God made him who had no sin to be sin^[b] for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.

Loving You and Forgiving Your Self

      As I reviewed my post from last night about finding hope, I realized there was one key factor that I hadn't mentioned. It deals with forgiving yourself and learning to like, then love, who you are and who you are becoming. Over the last few years that I've been counseling folks on beating addiction and putting God first in there lives, one of my most repeated comments to them has been that you can't move forward while looking back at your life and dwelling on your mistakes. Now, that doesn't mean that we simply forget everything. There were lessons we learned that we must adhere to, in order to better ourselves. But, I spent so many years beating myself up over my failures and the pain I had cause others along the way, Even when they had forgiven me. This had a great deal to do with my low self-esteem. I couldn't forgive myself, which led to me crawling into the bottom of a liquor bottle, or stoning my brain on weed. Often. Not only did I not love me, I didn't even want to be around me. But, when that breakdown moment came to me in rehab on '08, I honestly felt Jesus's love. I knew at that moment that He had forgiven me.
     I have to be honest with y'all too. I'm stubborn. So, it still took a couple of years for me to totally grasp this,(Rome wasn't built in a day, ya know), But, as I began to feel His love, I was floored with the thought that Jesus, as perfect, wise and loving to all as He was, and the fact that He knew EVERY thing I had done wrong, He still forgave me. ME! A sinner. A huge sinner. (Here's where I bounce back to "Finding Hope.") We won't find true hope until we have dived headfirst into the Word of God, and begin to daily apply it to our lives. I'm sure that I've read the New testament at least 3 or 4 times, cover to cover, over the last 5 years. And there are certain books in the New Testament that I've read dozens and dozens of times. I can't stress enough how important it is to read the word daily. I can't stress enough how important it is to take a daily inventory of what we did wrong AND what we did right. I do this every night before bed, and I spend part of my few minutes in each morning's bible devotional reflecting on what I can do to be better than I was the day before. I fail at that a lot. You will too. But, we have got to become honest with ourselves, and that, even though we still fall down, we keep giving it our best. Congratulate yourself for these small victories. We also have to learn to ask forgiveness from others, (and forgiving others as well), and, by having this daily study of His word, know that God has forgiven us, when we ask from our hearts for that forgiveness and for healing.
       Guys and girls, I am not going to try to tell you that this is easy. Being a Christian takes discipline. It takes devotion. I can't figure out how to say this to folks who didn't see me at my worst, but trust me when I tell you that my life has been one screwed up mess after another, until I finally let Jesus forgive me. Yep. You heard me right. I LET Jesus forgive me. I knew that I didn't deserve His forgiveness, but He tells us over and over again that He doesn't care what we've done or how many times we've done it. If we repent, If we do our best to right our wrongs, If we believe Him,(not just believe In Him) and if we have faith that he lived, died, and rose from the grave for us, He WILL forgive us. it's that simple. But, it goes back to what I said in the "Finding Hope" post. Nothing short of developing a true, committed, and honest relationship with God will let us find this peace in our lives amid the turmoil of the world that surrounds us. You have to give in and give ALL to Jesus. And, one day soon after, you will look around and start liking who you are becoming. One day, you'll actually love yourself as a child of God. His word will keep you humble. His word will keep you calm while the storms of life surge all around you. He, and ONLY He, will lead you through that turbulence IF you let Him. But folks, you Have to decide that HE is number one in your lives. His teachings don't change with the times or with society. He is rock-solid constant. He will begin immediately to turn that shifting, weak foundation of your life into the same solid rock. But, you must BELIEVE. You Must commit yourselves to His ways. I promise you, God will never steer you wrong. Trust in Him with all your heart, soul, and mind. Forgive your Self. You will then see that relationship with Him forming. It is the most beautiful thing that has ever happened to me. I'm living proof that the worst sinners can be saved. You can be, too. Let your life be God-Driven.
May God's love and peace guide you.
Love each other. Be good to yourselves.
PEACE,
              Brother J

Where is Hope, an' How Do we Find It?

        Greetings brothers and sisters. Let's start off with a definition. "Hope", is to desire something, with expectation of receiving it. Remember when you were a kid and you heard the ice cream man's truck? Man, I do. "Desire" would kick itself in gear in my little 6 year old brain.(An' It still kicks my 44 yr old brain into gear too, when I hear the tunes from the truck today). And, because I had seen the ice cream truck come down my street before, when I heard that music playing over on Bellevue street in my little hometown of Clinton, Ms., I had a reasonable "expectation" that he would drive down Berkshire street, on which I lived, within a few short minutes. Now all I had to do was run find Mama or Daddy before the ice cream truck drove by. This is where I also learned about "disappointment", when I couldn't find one of them fast enough to give me a quarter.
     
      Okay, if we can quit thinkin' about ice-cream now, I think we're all on the same page about the worldly definition of "Hope." But, the hope I want to talk about is the hope we have, or can have, with and through Jesus Christ.  The apostle Peter called it a "Living Hope." He said, "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead." 1 Peter 1:3 . So, what do you think that means? A "Living Hope." Well, Jesus brought us what I call "True Life." It isn't a life of this world. This world is full of hate, hypocrisy, and evil. It's full of backstabbing, gossip, and idolatry of all kinds. This physical world is bein' run by the devil himself. 1 John 5:19 "We know that we are children of God, and that the whole world is under the control of the evil one." Hmmm. How can there be hope for us then? That first part of that verse; " We know that we are children of God." Let me back up and tell you how "it", that is, "Hope", came to me....
 
       I spent most of my life believing that, in order for me to accept myself, I had to be accepted by others. I had to have someone to love, and who would love me back. Honestly, I didn't have much self esteem back then. Now, I could put on a good show of self confidence(or arrogance, dependin' on who ya asked.) and that carried me for a number of years. But, all that time, I was constantly "self medicating" to drown out that inferiority complex that was building up inside. I drank. A lot. I called it "partying" back then. I smoked enough marijuana that Willie Nelson or Bob Marley would've been impressed. That's A lot. I called it "winding down". Occasionally, when I got depressed, I'd go find some coke, (an' I don't mean cola.) I did all of that, just to try to cope with a very low opinion of myself. I had no hope. Let me stop and ask you.... Does this sound like anyone you know?
 
      Now, this doesn't mean I didn't know God. I went to church. I started going, by myself, shortly after I turned 10 years old. I was a part of an amazing youth group at FUMC in Clinton, Ms, that had an awesome Youth Director, Tommy Artmann. Tommy worked so hard with us to help us come to know Jesus. But, MY problem was that I just didn't think I was worthy. Is anybody recognizing someone you know or knew, yet? Well, stick with me, here. I'm gettin' there...
 
       I left high school mid-way through my senior year and joined the corps. the Marine Corps. Among other things, I learned how to drink like a "professional", at 17 years old, stumbling down the bar-lined streets of Japan and South Korea for a year. That was also where I learned to drink to escape "reality", and it got to be a daily habit that I used whenever I had a tough day, which was most every day, for the next 20 years...
        I know you're looking for a point to all this. I'm tryin' to get there. I spent most of my life trying to fit into a world that I didn't belong in. None of us belong there either. It's that world of Satan that I'm talking about. It destroys Hope! In Satan's world, we are constantly trying to keep up. We try to keep up with trends. we try to keep up the latest music, or styles, or the neighbor who drives a cool car, motorcycle, or , perhaps it's a boat. We try to take extravagant vacations and cruises. Then we work overtime and weekends to pay for it all. Where's the "Hope" in all that? What exactly is the desire and expectation? To outshine someone else? To have the most toys, or money, when we die? This kind of hope leads one place, and one place only. That's death. Probably an early death, at that. This is how so many of us "lose" hope. So, how can we find it again? The answer is Jesus. Read on....
 
      Five years ago, in August 2008, I was sitting in an inpatient rehab small-group, two weeks into my 36 day stay. I don't recall what was being discussed, but I suddenly burst into tears. It was that moment that Jesus touched my heart and told me He loved me. Me. he loved ME? A washed up alcoholic? and over the course of the next few years, He led me on a journey of self discovery. He even led me to a "family" biker group, who showed me love and acceptance like I had never seen, or maybe just never had recognized before. Yep. Jesus brought me back into being a child of God through a bunch of hard ridin', mildly wild family of bikers, who truly loved me, emotional scars and all. As our bonds developed, some of them also became deeply determined to keep me sober.  And from that experience I began to see that, with these guys and girls, and with Jesus, it didn't matter what I had, or what kind of job I did, or how much money I had, or even what kind of bike I rode. It was all about a love of riding and hanging out with like-minded folks who shared the passion of the wind on 2 wheels. With Jesus, it's all about love. Remember the two most important commandments Jesus taught? Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. And love your neighbor as you love yourself. Love! Put away all these worldly cares, and just love! Now, of course we have to pay our bills, put food on the table, raise our children and put them through school. But, if you really believe in Love, this Agape love, Christian love for brother and sister, that Jesus loves you as a child of our Father in Heaven, that horrible word "worry" will leave your vocabulary. Why? Well, think about the person you've loved or love more than anything or anybody else on this earth. It's awesome, isn't it? You're not worried about whether they will love you tomorrow, or next week. It's solid, right? Well, guess what? Jesus loves you 10,000 times more than that. Incredible. Don't you think that someone who loves you that much more than anything you've ever seen or felt will take care of you? Don't you think He knows what you need? He even knows what you and I need more than we do, ourselves! And that's where this "Hope" comes in. It, Hope, walks hand in hand with something else, called "Faith." We develop faith, that Jesus will guide and provide us, with all we need.
 
      Folks, sometimes, many times, these things, relationships don't happen all at once. First, you've got to make some effort. An' yes, you have to keep at it. God inspired the prophets and the apostles with a whole big book of information to help us make it through this evil world. We must read it. Daily. Sometimes it can be quite confusing. That's why we must find a small-group, a bible study, or a Sunday School class. I spent 16 years studying theology on my own, but I (obviously) never found the key to understanding and living a Godly life. But, when I started going to a bible study, or holding family bible studies, things that didn't make sense to me, made sense to someone else, so we learned from each other. It's part of another necessary thing, called Fellowship. During that 16 yrs of studying, I read it repeatedly, that we need fellowship, but I wanted to do it my way. I went to church sometimes. I even played in a praise band and helped out the youth group sometimes. But, I wanted God to walk on MY life's path with ME. MY way. How'd that work for me? Not too good... But, when I finally decided to follow God on HIS road, on HIS terms, my life changed. I found Love. I felt loved. I found Faith. and I found H.O.P.E.

       I gave in, and then I gave it all to God to direct me in my life. When money was low, I prayed,"God, please see me through it." When my health got bad 2 years ago, I prayed,"God, please see me through it." When my 52 year old sister died in 2010, I prayed, "God, please see me through it." It was my way of saying," Lord, I trust you. I know that you know what I need. And I know you know that some things I think I need, I really don't. But, I have faith that you will answer my needs, as long as I continue to walk in your light, to do your will, to keep learning how to love, and to keep studying and applying your Word to my life."
 
      It's that simple. I promise. I've seen this work many, many times. And it finally happened for me when I went beyond beliving in God, and I started to believe God's Word!(Remember, even the devil believes in God. Anyone can do that. But it takes a relationship to believe someone, and to trust and follow them. ) Now, I have hope. I have hope, because I have faith. I have faith, because I have love for Jesus. That love has put a desire into my heart. Remember that word from the definition? "Desire." Because I read and study the Bible, God's Word, I know what He is offering us. Therefore I have an "expectation", because of His promise to us. I truly, deeply desire HIS love and have an expectation that he will provide for my needs. He says He will. Folks, he has never failed me. I've never heard of God failing anybody. So, ultimately, I found faith in Him.
Faith. Hope. And Love. Paul writes about love in 1 Corinthians 13 1-13. The last line says this; "And now these three remain: Faith, Hope and Love. But the greatest of these is love."
       So, what is the key to hope? It's love. It ie the love of and from our Father in Heaven, the love of and from our lord, savior, and King, Jesus Christ, and it is the soft loving comfort and counsel of the Holy Spirit that Jesus brought us, that dwells inside our hearts, our souls, our minds, our spirit, and our words. But, we have to make time EVERY day to be still, and listen for the Spirit, and listen for that calm and gentle, loving and guiding voice that is the Lord speaking to our heart. Some days I have to have 20 or 30 "still" moments. But, He always gets me through those rough days. Always.
 
      Folks, We have GOT to stop trying to get God to come into our lives on our paths, on our terms. We have to get into HIS life, and ON HIS TERMS.  And, more than just hearing and obeying His Word, we have to develop a relationship with God.
 
     Finally, understand this one very important truth. God loves you. I've done some pretty horrible things over the course of my life. God accepted me. A Big sinner. Someone reminded me that God accepted David, an adulterer, to lead His people. He called Moses, a murderer, to lead His people. He called Peter, who denied Jesus three times, then ran away and went back to fishing when Jesus was captured. Peter led the Lord's people. And then we have Paul, formerly known as Saul, who was a Pharisee, who had Christians stoned and beaten. Saul was present during the trial of Stephen, the first Christian Martyr, and had a hand in his death. Yet, Saul became Paul after Jesus appeared in spirit form to him, and Paul then wrote most of the books of the New Testament, and founded churches all over the middle east. Paul, a sinner, led the Lord's children. I've known many people throughout my life that have told me horrid stories about who they once were before God filled them and changed their lives. Some are now ministers. Some are wonderful mothers or fathers. Some are teachers. And some of them are bikers who ride for Jesus and spread His message of faith, hope, and love far and wide across the countryside. Listen to this. Hear this. Jesus loves you. YOU. No matter what you've done. No matter what you haven't done. You're here. you're alive. It is not too late to pick up your cross. Lay down your burden of guilt or shame. Confess your sins and pray for forgiveness. Learn who He IS, and follow Him.

       I hope I made some kind of sense today. In my excitement to begin carrying out this task that God has laid before me, to share His Word through this blog while He prepares me to pastor and to preach, I'm sure I've made a few rookie mistakes. It may take a little while for me to be more concise and stay on point with each message of the week, which I will attempt to write each Sunday evening and publish by Monday evening. There may be times that I post every day of a week. Sometimes maybe only once or twice. Feel free to contact me with suggestions or with questions about anything I write. If you see something you believe to be wrong, by all means, bring it to my attention, too.
 
       Let's close with a prayer. A prayer of Hope. Take a moment and pray it with me...
 " Dear Lord, My gratitude to you is more than words can express. I thank you for forgiving  my sins. I pray Lord, guide me with your Word, speak to my heart and soul, fill me with your Holy spirit so that I may learn to turn away from those things that bring sin upon my life. Deliver me Lord from my chains that keep me from you. Strengthen my faith, Lord. Light your path for me to follow. Teach me to love, so that with faith in you, with love from and for you, with love for my brothers and sisters who teach me to strive to help each other, I will know hope. Your living Hope. I pray that it dwell in me and bind up the evil that tries to pull me away from you. I give thanks to You, Lord, and I ask these prayers in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen."

   May God's love and peace guide y'all through this week.
I love you, my brothers and sisters in Christ Jesus.
 
In His Service,
                      Brother Jay
                                        
                                                      

Obstacles To God's Grace

    First, let me say thanks to the encouragement some of ya'll have given me today after reading my first ever blog post. I can't tell you how nervous I have been, and still am, at the thought of opening up my life for all the world to see, like this. But, as I attempt to collect my thoughts and pray for direction with this new blog adventure with Jesus, I thought I'd share a sermon I put together for a Kairos prison ministry weekend that I was supposed to speak at. First, a little background. Kairos is a prison ministry program. A team of Christian men is put together,(this one consisted of 42 of us), and we spend two months having weekly 4 hour meetings, training, getting to know each other and forming friendships and forging a new family of brothers with a goal of sharing the word of God. At the end of our training meetings, we spend 4 days at a prison,(going home each night), where we interact in small groups and sermons with and to prisoners who sign up to take part and hear the messages that God has sent us in with. I went in and participated in a one day ministry last year and it hooked me. So, when the Spring 2013 Kairos team formed, I got my chance. After a few meetings, I was asked to speak on this subject of obstacles we(and they) potentially face in receiving God's grace. I was given a short guideline to work from, put into my own words, and then to deliver this message on the final day of our 4 day mission. Boy, was I familiar with these obstacles!  However, about two weeks before we were to go into the prison, central Mississippi was hit with a storm, with hail as big as softballs. It did over 2 million dollars worth of damage to the Central MS Correctional Facility. Needless to say, our mission was postponed. It has been rescheduled for June, so all hasn't been in vain. The following is the last draft I made. I'm never completely satisfied with what I write, and I see a couple of tweaks that I want to make before we go in. But, it has some good points to ponder, and I hope it will bring you to stop and think about what obstacles you face in your walk with God.
  We all face challenges. But, sometimes we settle into a "coping rhythm" and fail to realize and recognize that we are making things hard on ourselves, and that these rhythmic short-cuts we take to get through a day are preventing us from hearing God. I spent so many years being angry and defensive that I couldn't have heard God if he'd been yelling an' jumping up and down with signal flares in his hands.
  It's a long read. So, find twenty minutes, sit back, check it out, and then take just a few more minutes to think about where you might find some of your own obstacles to receiving the grace and salvation of our lord and savior, Jesus Christ. Then remember, "I can do ALL with Christ who strengthens me." Phillipians 4:13
God bless y'all...
        Brother Jay






                                                Obstacles To God's Grace

      We’ve been talking all Weekend about God’s plan for our lives, from forming a Friendship with God and the security that comes from that, to forgiving others and ourselves and accepting His eternal forgiveness for us. And we just prayed, asking for His help to remove those painful memories that can become a hindrance in our daily walk with Christ, so we can become a source of help to a brother/sister to relieve their burden.

II.    Here’s an easy definition of God’s grace:

A.An everlasting, loving relationship with a forgiving God, just like the father in the story of the Prodigal Son. The Grace of the Lord is unconditional, and we don’t deserve it.

                                            (1)

   The best thing about all of this is that it is free!  When was the last time you ever got something this significant and it didn’t cost you anything? That’s what the expression “Good News” is all about.

           But, while this grace is a free gift from our Father, it can get messed up when left up to us…messed up by what we call the Obstacles to Grace.  What are these obstacles, these roadblocks?  Let’s break it down into three basic areas. 1. People. 2. Places. 3. Things. My associate pastor compared it to an umbrella in a sermon he gave a few years ago. It’s an umbrella called Sin. In this comparison, God’s grace is like a soft  steady rain coming down and washing us clean; healing our wounds; teaching us how to fix our transgressions, our wrongs that we’ve done to ourselves and wrongs we’ve done against others. And then that umbrella opens up. Pfffp. That’s when Satan steps in. He tries to convince us that we don’t need to be cleaned up by that old rain. Satan is an obstacle. Maybe sometimes he’ll try to tell you that you can go to church services any other day, but it’s not every day that you can get 3 other guys to play a solid round of spades. Or maybe you hang back and find a way to make up some makeshift dice, or you’re side-betting on the winners while you’re watching a domino game. That’s waayy more important, the devil says. There’s that umbrella. That obstacle. Or, how ‘bout the guys in the block or on the yard who are just waitin’ for that first slip you make as a new Christian, so they can hold it over you,  criticize you, taunt you, Tell you that you’re a fake, A fraud. They try to coax you back into their clique, their little circle, or their gang. They’re gonna try to make it a tough road for you now. And if you let them get to you, that anger and resentment you allowed yourself to feel blocks out the peace that God brings to us. Those guys I just talked about are what?(They’re obstacles.) They are that People umbrella that prevents God’s love from keeping you clean.

    The world you live in is a hostile place, filled with people overflowing with negativity. Understand this; Some of your friends, fellow Residents, and even family members are not standing in line to hug you out there; they could care less about what you’ve experienced.

                                                   (2)

Some of them will even try to destroy this experience. Be ready, because they Will follow you all over the yard, calling you a hypocrite every time you lapse.  But remember, we are all broken vessels on a spiritual journey with Christ.  We are not perfect people without problems.

 

    Some of your old friends will not like the fact that you’re trying to change the way you’re living your life.  They want you to go back to being like you’ve always been.  They will ridicule you and put tremendous pressure on you. But just like Jesus did while he was incarcerated, you must resist.  Remember, the choice to resist is totally yours.  Will it be easy? No.

   And to make things worse, you may even find some of your Christian brothers who “act good” when the Kairos team is here or the chaplain is around; otherwise, they continue to act like they always have the rest of the time.  How many of you know folks like this? 

     How about the one guy who goes through the right motions of being a Christian with all the proper moves and sings just the right words to all the songs.  But that’s all there is to him.

     Guys, there’s a big difference in being a Christian and being Christian.  Being “A” Christian is a label. Being Christian is an action, a life-style choice. We must act as Jesus taught us to in order to be Christian. The same goes for the difference in believing in God or believing God. Even the devil believes in God. But he doesn’t believe that God’s way is the best way.

   

     How about that guy who remembers scripture so well? He can quote scripture with the best of them.  I know you’ve seen guys like that because we see them in the outside world, too.  And the best one, or worst one is the two-faced Hypocrite.  He acts one way at Kairos or the chaplain’s chapel functions, but back in the compound, he’s totally opposite, right? These kinds of people will bother you – a lot...maybe even to the point that you won’t want to have anything to do with them or Christianity. But, If you let this happen, you will be the loser! 

         

                                                     (3)

        How ‘bout places, and things? Somewhere inside these fences,

      there are places you know you shouldn’t be going. There’s probably a corner of the yard that has folks you shouldn’t be hanging out with. There are people in here that can get drugs. There are guys in the dining hall you don’t need to be sitting with. Think about it this way. If some “thing” you do, whether it’s playing games, or swiping food off someone’s tray, hassling a corrections officer, or spreading gossip, if this “thing” is not “of God” it’s against God. There is no neutral middle ground here.  

           These “things” can simply be desires you’re being tempted by. These desires are obstacles. Just imagine that umbrella hovering over you in all these circumstances. I bet you can think of some more in your own life here, or when you get back to the free-world. Maybe there are streets you shouldn’t walk down. Clubs or bars you shouldn’t hang out around anymore. You are your own obstacle when you let these desires get to you instead of seeking peace in the Word of God.

          Guys, nobody ever said following Jesus was easy. Sometimes it’s downright tough. Some days, walkin’ in the rain of the Lord is a wonderful feelin’. Some days it’s cold. But that umbrella of sin won’t get you to the Father. It won’t let you discern the word of God. You’ll be just like the Pharisees, who couldn’t understand Jesus when He spoke in parables to the disciples.  It won’t free your heart, your soul, and your mind to let the the Holy Spirit live and grow within you and guide you, especially in those tough times, like when you’re at that in-between stage as a new Christian an’ your pulling away from your old sinful habits and learning how to open up to let God in, and to open up to your new Christian brothers.  Being Christian has never been easy. How easy was it for Jesus to be ridiculed, punished, beaten, and then executed in front of his own mother?

   (Delbert story- movies, people he hangs around, unhealthy things he allows himself to think about, the change that takes place in our hearts in how we think peacefully…)  ( then the Going to the dr story about the bill.)

  That umbrella of sin is also like an old pair of ratty shoes. They’re well broken-in, so much so that they’ve formed to your feet.

                                                   (4)

They’re comfortable. They’re familiar. But underneath, they’re full of holes in their soles. And here comes a mud-puddle that you can’t walk around. The mud-puddle ofSin, immoral criminal friends from your past, old hangouts, old habits. Obstacles! Those holes in the soles of your shoes are like the holes in your souls too. The devil was all up in our business before we accepted Jesus as our lord and savior. Satan had built himself a nice cozy little pad to chill on in our souls, in our thoughts and in our actions. But, through the power of the Holy Spirit, we evicted the evil one from our soul. We renounced and rejected his evil ways. But now, left alone, those holes in our soul will let the Spirit leak right out of us, just like that puddle leaks into our old shoes and soaks our socks, shrivels up our feet, and let’s those nasty, painful Sin- blisters start to form. Obstacles. We need some “glue”. The “glue” of God. We need the glue of God to patch up and fill those holes in our soul. We need God to restore our shoes and remake them new and fresh-smelling  again. We need fellowship. We need bible study. We need to read the Word daily, to know it, to feel it, and most importantly to live in the Word of God. We have to repent and ask forgiveness for our sins. We need to pray every day for strength from the Lord to beat back the devil. Sometimes I pray 20-30 times a day. And we need to learn about the love that our lord and Savior Jesus Christ has for us, to believe that He died for our sins, went down through Hell for us, and then ascended into Heaven and that now, He’s waiting for His time to come back down and bring us an everlasting, eternal peace, to bring us to our new Heavenly home, and to defeat Satan and his demons once and for all. And what happens when we do these things? What happens when we open our heart and soul to the Lord? What happens when we start putting God’s Word first instead of our own old selfish wants? We develop Faith. Faith is that “Glue of God” that puts our souls back together; that heals our wounds; that gives us hope when we have dark days. Now, as Christians, I don’t believe that God is going to make every day easy and let us just skip

and hop from one decision or job  to the next without a thought or

                                          (5)

 without some effort on our part. I also don’t believe that everything that happens to us is God’s will, for God loved us so much, He gave us Free will. But, I DO believe that there IS God’s will for us in everything, but we have to seek out and follow it. God’s will for us is waiting to be found in and amongst everything that happens around us. But it’s up to us to open our eyes. It’s up to us to have faith that He will lead us through our tough times. It’s up to us when we get weak to be strong with Him, to let HIM dwell within us, to let His Spirit guide us, direct us, and comfort us.  A verse in the 23^rd Psalm says “ Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear NO evil, for thou art with me.” Folks, there are some beautiful mountaintops in our lives, and Glorious days of joy and happiness. But, there are also valleys in between those mountains that are full of these obstacles that try to stand between us and God. That’s Life! But, as you learn to walk this Christian path with the Lord, you will begin to identify more of these obstacles, more often automatically, and you’ll find that you’re happier than you ever thought possible when you’re standing on one of those peaks filled with the Holy Spirit and being led by God on HIS path that he’s laid for us. You’ll also find an inner peace, and comfort in His loving arms, even in the midst of turmoil and trouble, as He encourages and carries you through those valleys of evil, of hard times, and he’ll fill you with His loving strength when you are weak, as you begin your climb up to the next mountaintop….

  Here’s another thought for you to think about:  you can defeat evil and hypocrisy and pretended holiness by praying for, and with, yes, with, those other people rather than criticizing them.  This is true; just ask any of your free-world brothers here this Weekend who have experienced the very same thing as you.  There is great power in praying for and with others.  Don’t forget all of those all over the world, and those who are in prisons, who have been praying for all of us for the last 72 hours, and even before this Weekend started.  How powerful has that been to you?

 

                                                (6)   

    Think back to the 3^rd leg of our 3-legged stool: Christian Action.  We need to put our actions behind our words. Without that third leg of Action, our stool of Friendship with God cannot stand.  We need to replace our old habits with new habits of the faith. Remember the Choices talk on Friday morning?  It is a choice that all of us can consciously make.

    While most free-worlders can never begin to understand the tremendous stresses of being incarcerated, being Christian is costly on the outside world, too.  And guess what?  A lot of us fail.  We have trouble when confronted with some of the obstacles to grace.  Some of us still cave in to the world’s seductive things:  pornography, peer pressure, gambling, gossiping, arguing and fighting, alcohol/drugs. 

 But, for all of us, both free-world and Residents, a big step in overcoming our personal obstacles is to identify them and face them head-on.

  This morning in chapel, we were told that while forgiveness is absolutely necessary for having a Friendship with God, we must also begin the long and painful process of asking God to help us heal some of those ugly old memories.  My friends, not to do so, not to try to seek God’s healing can in itself become an obstacle to accepting God’s grace.  I pray, don’t let that happen to you.

     We need to face our indifference and our fear of being Christian in this institution, and outside these fences.  As stated before, this Weekend is not Kairos; this Weekend only opens the door to a lifelong journey, one that will have dark and stormy times in this place.  But it is a journey that the Kairos team will journey with you as we will be coming back every month to encourage you to share with each other.  And we will try to give you some other tools to help you on this journey, which is the subject of the next talk, Walking in God’s Grace.

                In the meantime, the choice is yours, brothers, to throw away that Umbrella of Sin, and put on your newly re-made shoes, and turn and walk away from these obstacles to God’s grace. Peace be with you all.

The Call From God knows No Boundaries

 Me? God called ME? To minister?? Yep, He sure did! Me. A sinner. And it scared me to death. Read on to see how....
  Hey, Folks. My name's Jay, and I'm a sinner. But, in a strange twist of fate one day, about 5 years ago I gave in to Jesus. My life had taken so many turns and left me a washed up drunk, addicted to pills and weed. My 3rd wife had left me. I'd just watched my father die of dementia over that last year. I couldn't stay sober long enough to go to work. My friends had grown weary of my drunken rants and weepy stories of failure. Most of them were long gone from my life. I was ready to die. But in one last attempt to save myself, I agreed to go into rehab. It was there that I found God again,(and it was the last place I had expected to find Him). Over the next few years though, I began to see that He had never been lost! He'd been right there waiting patiently since I walked away from the church in 2003.
Over the next few years, as I began to trust in Him, my life began to turn around. Of all things, it was a bunch of Bikers who rallied around me and showed me the true meaning of Family. These guys and girls became my brothers and sisters, and remain in a special place in my heart, now and forever. It was there that I saw God doing His Finest work! And, slowly, I began to understand these things called Hope, Faith, and Love.   AND Then. And THEN... God spoke to my heart. I heard His voice reverberating through my soul. HE told me that I had a story to tell. A story of hope, shown to others through this story of my failure(s). And, He flat-out told me to preach it from the pulpit. Man, you talked about someone who got scared. That was me. Me! The guy who is scared of public speaking. Me! The guy who just barely holds it all together some days. Me, an alcoholic/addict, long-haired hippy, tattooed, former devil-dog fightin' Marine, wanna-be redneck, Rocker musician, leather and dew-rag wearin' biker. Me? I wondered if God had just made his first mistake... Thank Him, He didn't...
   So. what is this blog all about? It's about Hope, when all hope seems to be lost. It's about an ongoing journey with the Lord, as we start a church together. Once it becomes official, it will be called Christ's Church of Hope. It is a non-denominational church, specifically aimed at people who have lost their way in Life. It's for the oppressed, those in emotional pain and despair, and those who are or were imprisoned, be they locked up in jail or in their hearts and lives.
 Along the way, I will share with you some of the lessons Jesus has taught me, and some He is still trying to teach me. But, the greatest message I wish to express is this one of hope. By early 2008, I had absolutely lost everything I valued in my life, except the love I felt from my dear mother and my precious 13 year old son, at the time. I thought God had forgotten and left me, too. But, I came to learn that He had never gone anywhere! I had simply refused to open my heart to Him. But, when I finally did, wow, did my life change! And, I believe that God has directed me to bare all my sins, my failures, and my pains, to help others, maybe even you, come to understand that hope is NOT lost! I will tell you though, that there is only one way to find it. IT is through our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Only He can lead us to our father in Heaven, and fill us with the awesome, beautiful, guiding power of the Holy Spirit.
 Stay tuned. Sign on. Come along and find out how God gave me my life back, then turned it into something that I had never dreamed could be so full of joy and peace, even in the toughest moments. Life is tough, folks. There will always be bills to pay and struggles to overcome, as long as we walk this earth. But, with and through the love and hope we put in Jesus, He will walk with and lead us through every valley we trudge through, and He will be the foothold that helps us climb to each mountain-top.  (And, by the way, that 3rd ex wife? She's now my 4th wife. God brought us back together and made us one, through Him, this time.) I love you, my sweet princess, Leine. Thank you for your love and support.

 So, come on, brothers and sisters. Let's walk together, with HIM leading us. It's an awesome road, when we let Him lead...

Peace to All y'all,
                     Brother Jay